Belonging Without Permission
Join author Stephanie Licata, M.A., ACC, in conversation with Anne Peterson, founder of iLumn8.Life, for an honest look at family roles, people-pleasing, and what it takes to stop waiting for someone else's permission to heal.
Reserve My SpotFree to attend. Your Zoom link arrives by email as soon as you sign up.
Do you have to abandon yourself to keep the peace?
Many of us were taught that family loyalty is unconditional, that silence is strength and enduring is a form of love. But what happens when keeping the peace means living with constant anxiety, guilt and self-doubt?
In Belonging Without Permission, Stephanie Licata looks at how emotional abuse, rigid family roles, people-pleasing, grief and long-held expectations shape the way we see ourselves and handle our adult relationships.
She draws on her own story, her academic background in counseling and organizational psychology, and an anonymous survey of 100 people. Along the way she shows how survival patterns learned in childhood, like fawning and over-functioning, quietly "commute to work" with us, showing up in our careers, our boundaries and our sense of worth.
This book may be useful if you:
- Are starting to see that what you went through as a child, or still put up with as an adult, is emotionally harmful, disrespectful or abusive.
- Are considering distance from a persistently toxic relative, or have already taken that step and are working through the grief that follows.
- Are facing a deep values divide that makes a basic mismatch in decency and respect impossible to ignore.
- Have spent years over-functioning to keep a relationship going (apologizing, accommodating, over-explaining) and have come to see that a healthy relationship needs two willing people.
What this book is not
It isn't a case for casually cutting people off, or walking away after one argument. Sometimes healing calls for physical distance. Other times it means changing expectations, setting firmer limits, or learning to stay in a relationship differently. The book helps you tell which is which, and build a table of your own, rooted in mutual respect and emotional safety.
Stephanie Licata
Stephanie is a learning and leadership consultant, executive coach, speaker and facilitator who helps leaders, teams and organizations build healthier, more human workplaces. She has trained thousands of leaders across industries from technology and healthcare to education, nonprofits and tribal organizations.
She brings that same lens (communication, power dynamics, emotional safety, accountability and unresolved conflict) to the place many of us learned our first patterns: family. Her writing is honest, compassionate and practical, and it doesn't minimize the real harm toxic family systems can cause.
Stephanie holds a master's degree in organizational psychology from Columbia University, completed her coaching certification through New York University, and is certified through the International Coaching Federation.
Stephanie in conversation with Anne Peterson
Anne will talk with Stephanie about the ideas at the heart of the book: where people-pleasing begins, how family roles follow us into adult life and work, and what it looks like to belong without waiting for permission. There will be time for audience questions.
You're welcome to come with a question, or simply to listen.
October 29, 2026
3pm Eastern
Sign up and the link is emailed to you
An afternoon to celebrate Stephanie, and a conversation many people need
Celebrate Stephanie
Writing a book this personal takes courage. Come mark the day it goes out into the world, with the people who have cheered her on.
A live, honest discussion
Family roles, people-pleasing and estrangement touch more lives than most of us realize. This is a chance to hear them talked about openly and with care.
Ask your own questions
There will be time for audience questions. Share one if you'd like, or simply listen. Both are welcome.
Release day: Belonging Without Permission goes live on Amazon on October 29, and we'll share the link to order your copy during the launch.
Save your seat
Thursday, October 29 · Noon Pacific / 3pm Eastern · Live on Zoom. Free to attend. Sign up and your Zoom link comes straight to your inbox.
Reserve My SpotCome for Stephanie. Stay for the conversation.